About Alan & Kat

We’re still learning, too.

We’re Alan and Kat Gilliam, parents to our boys and the couple behind @thegilliamfam.

Like a lot of couples, we hit a point where one of us was carrying most of the mental load, and the other didn’t fully see it. Not because anyone didn’t care, but because nobody had ever shown us what shared ownership actually looks like.

So we started figuring it out. We named the invisible work, rethought what “fair” meant for our season, and learned to let go of doing things one “right” way. It’s made our home calmer and our partnership stronger.

This challenge is everything we’ve learned, built so you can do it together in 21 days.

“Fair doesn’t always mean equal. It means you’re both carrying it together.”